Check Twice, Panic Once


I may have failed a couple times this week at the art of mothering. Not from lack of trying, but apparently when I thought I was “saving” my child by keeping her home from daycare to help her feel better- I was really condemning her to sub par care given by the one, the only… me (imagine that twinkling in lights.)

Let me explain. My youngest, who is four years old, is a feisty little munchkin. She was sick with a fever as of Wednesday. No daycare for her. We stayed home and I took good care of her… that day. Also the following day in which she was still feverish.

I mean, there could be arguments made that as a mother I shouldn’t have to brag that I took good care of her because it is the expectation, but also who is writing this you or me? That’s what I thought.

So on Friday things hit the fan. I may have been going slightly stir crazy. She may also have been doing the same. Additionally I may have been overtired. She definitely was. So my eyes went shut… before I continue can we agree that at 4 years old I should be able to “rest my eyes” (as my grandma used to call it) without a catastrophe occurring? Okay, we won’t agree on that.

I open my eyes to her little face in my face telling me she swallowed a necklace. I freaked out because we have been extremely lucky up until this point with no swallowing, sticking objects in nose, or sticking object in ear requiring hospital runs. My streak was about to be ruined. I tried to get some information from her. She was relatively nonplussed with the whole thing. What necklace? Was it silver one or one that you made? No information was given. How did it taste?.. No, information. Like did it taste plastic-ly or silver-like? Spicy. That is her favorite descriptor right now. Mac and cheese is spicy for her sometimes. I probably should have just left off asking taste, now I’m more confused than I started out as.

[bctt tweet=”Got a shameful #parenting moment to share? #losethecape”]

I jump online to ask a nurse and research… I get the info that it’s okay. That this apparently has happened to other people and I am not the worse mom in the world. To be fair that is what I am surmising- no one actually told me I am not the worst.

I take a break from reading and figuring out how I am going to strain her poo to look for the necklaces for the next day (do you think they make bedazzled colanders to make this task a little more glamorous?) During that break I find something on the floor under her. It’s a necklace.

I hold it up and ask- is this the necklace? The spicy necklace?

She frowns at me and accusingly says “How did you get that out of my mouth?!” This child is going to end me.

I have learned an important lesson. Always check around her because she is not above falsehoods. Later that day when she tried to tell me her hands were melting- I did not believe her. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on you still because I’m your mother and I will guilt trip you for the rest of your life.

Anybody else had some shameful parenting moments they want throw out there to make me feel better?