You’re already super, you don’t need to be SuperMom
Remember Wonder Woman? Beautiful, smart, wicked fast, and just straight-up super. We vividly recall watching episodes of Lynda Carter in our younger years, kicking butt with her arsenal of weapons. Oh, how we long for her Lasso of Truth, the stylish and indestructible bracelets, the stunning tiara (which also served as a handy and deadly projectile), and the invisible airplane. In fact, maybe that was when the desire in us (and in many girls) to sport superhuman skills began.
Being young girls in the 70s and 80s, we were told we could do anything, have everything. Get good grades. Play competitive sports. Apply to the best colleges. So we did.
Later, like many of you reading this book, the two of us were lucky enough to land great spouses, launch careers, and buy homes. Eventually, we took the ultimate plunge: we became moms.
Fast forward to our present day, and now we each have three kids.
We juggle careers and freelance work, household chores and bills, date nights and homework, after-school activities and meal planning.
On any given day, life throws us a “curveball” in the form of a sick kid, broken appliance, sibling fight, and so on. The list is long. But if you’re a mom – or dad – you can relate.
This is life. We roll with it.
Yet, there is pressure as those mantras of our youth still ring in our heads. You can do it. You can make it. You can be “supermom”.
As we strive to be the best moms possible, we can’t help but feel there is an underlying pressure. The quest to be “supermom” flutters inside our brains as we criticize our efforts.
We yell at ourselves for not doing more, doing better, doing it all.
What’s with the endless laundry pile?
Why am I feeding my family fish sticks and tater tots … again?
Ugh, what’s up with the baby weight sticking to my middle … for the past five years?
Why is my kid behind the other kids in walking, in talking, in school?
I can’t bake worth crap.
I haven’t slept through the night in 10 years.
Admit it – you too have your own criticisms swirling inside.
Why can’t I be more like her?
Why is this motherhood job so freaking hard?
Why can’t I be just a little more “super?”
Go ahead and Lose the Cape mamas!
Social media has only heightened our need to appear as “the perfect mom,” completely in control of the situation and raising the perfect family. That’s what the other moms are doing, right? According to the media they are. We see images of young moms looking gorgeous in magazines, casually holding a toddler on the hip in their pristine family room. We scroll Pinterest and various social media outlets to find outlandish, crafty parties and creative teacher gifts in addition to lists of ideal activities to do with each child in every season of the year and at every life stage. We compare mothering styles and choices on sites and blogs, debating breastfeeding and sleep training and working and preschool and sports and college applications.
Likewise, we see women tear one another up, arguing their side, their philosophy, their style, while dismissing anyone who might make different choices.
Some call this the “Mommy Wars.”In a world that often divides mothers, we realized the #MommyWars are so 2000. #losethecape Click To Tweet
Mothering is hard enough without being in a “war” over your decisions as you plod through the trenches.
Regardless of your mom style, we all agree we love our kids … like crazy. Yes, there are days they drive us nuts, but we love them and recognize that time flies. As Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project often states, “The days are long, but the years go fast.”
All moms face a zillion modern-day stresses, so in this book we address topics like morning routines, the social media time suck, meal planning, making mom friends, and beyond.
When we wrote our book Lose the Cape: Realities from Busy Modern Moms and Strategies to Survive, we gathered diverse mom voices from around the country to share tips and tricks. As our book will reveal, there is no “one way” to beat the mom stresses.
The two of us came together because, despite our many differences, we agree on most things regarding motherhood. Living on opposite coasts of the United States, one of us is a stay-at-home mom (and freelancer) while the other works full-time and commutes to an office. Yet, in the face of our varied schedules, we respect one another and share the same views on motherhood.
In a world that often divides mothers, placing them in separate camps and asking them to justify their choices, we realized the “Mommy Wars” are so 2000. Trying to be “supermom” is ridiculous – she does not exist.
We don’t claim to have all of the answers. We’re not experts. On most days, we’re like every other mom – trying to survive and show our kids some love.
But, we’ve learned along the way to cut some corners, learn some systems to gain control of the chaos, form support groups to lift us up, and find a way that works for our families and ourselves.
What’s our ultimate goal?
To be the best mom possible, of course. We try to be super every day, but we don’t aspire to be “supermom.”
This mothering gig is serious stuff. You’re not given a handbook on how to deal with your kid. Yes, there are millions of parenting books and sites, but your little people (or big people) are unique, your spouse is unique, you are unique.
So use this book as you like. Pick up some tips. Enjoy a laugh. Recognize you’re not alone when you worry, stress, and lose control as a parent. Each chapter touches on a modern mom stress, and we’ve simply tried to acknowledge the journey is crazy, joyful, and unique for every family.
But above all else, we hope you embrace our core message of finding what works for you and your kids. Stop the comparison game, stop beating yourself up, and most importantly, don’t aspire to be “supermom” – just be YOU and Lose the Cape!